Christmas already

This was the first morning in a long time that the sun rise was not hidden by gloomy clouds.
We went to look at Christmas lights last night. Most of the pictures didn't turn out. The house in these pictures was amazing. Miranda just loved it. I have not felt like it was Christmas. Yet it is only a few days away.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

MIRANDA

Christmas party, Santa, haircuts, and a laugh

The mobile home park we live in always has Santa in the park office around Christmas. The kids enjoyed seeing Santa. Coleman and Sarah told me that they were very glad they knew Santa knows what they want. I have Coleman's picture on flickr.

I finally was brave enough to get my hair cut. I had a lot taken off but it is so nice to have a hair style again. The picture below is after a long day of running and chasing kids so it doesn't look the greatest. I had it cut Thursday night.
Friday night was my company Christmas party. I had a good time. It is so funny to see the people you work with all dressed up and not up tight about work. Of course the best part is the drunk ones that make ass's out of themselves. The picture below is of the dance floor. The lady in the middle white shirt with black belt was the craziest dancer. She was all over the dance floor. I can't even explain it. I didn't have a problem getting up there after seeing her dance. A lot of people were taking pictures and videos of her dancing. I think it was the best part of the evening.

AND NOW FOR SOME LAUGHS

(I have add my own names to make it more fun)

Say Something Positive
A husband(Randy) and wife(Sybil) are getting ready for bed. Sybil is standing in front of a full-length mirror taking a hard look at herself. "You know, dear," she says, "I look in the mirror, and I see an old woman. My face is all wrinkled, my hair is grey, my shoulders are hunched over, I've got fat legs, and my arms are all flabby." She turns to Randy and says, "Tell me something positive to make me feel better about myself." He studies hard for a moment thinking about it and then says in a soft, thoughtful voice, "Well, there's nothing wrong with your eyesight."

Sex Education
Coming through the door after school one day, Coleman hollers out...

"Okay everyone in the house, please stand advised that I, Coleman Richard Sterling, have on this date made a complete fool of myself in sex-education class by repeating stories concerning storks as told to me by certain parties residing in this house!"

Sunrise,Sickness, Plane tickets, & Laughs

Thursday morning the sunrise was like a beam coming from the ground it was so pretty. The above picture is from that morning. I didn't use photo shop on it. I thought it was beautiful.

The girls were very sick earlier this week. Miranda started complaining of her throat hurting her and was running a fever last Saturday night. I called Monday morning and got her an appointment at her doctors. Shortly after getting the appointment I noticed a rash and she was itching like crazy. The doctor said she had scarlet fever which was caused by her strep throat infection. We left the doctors and filled her prescription. When we arrived home there were two messages from the kids school saying Sarah was in the office with a sore throat and a fever. She had been there for two hours by the time I got home from the doctors. I felt so bad. She is so shy at school there for she wouldn't ask them for a cover. She laid there two hours cold. As for Miranda I'm sure most of you know how much of a candy addict she is. She was so sick she wouldn't even take a sucker when we were at the doctors. She usually begs for them from the minute we walk in and tries to snatch one if someone leaves the door open where you go back to the rooms. Everyone is doing better know.
Vince bought his plane tickets with help from his parents and there flier miles. He departs on December 31 around 10:45am. He is flying back on February 14th. and will get in around 10:35pm. That will be a long time to be away from him. I'm glad we get to see each other on Valentine's day. I believe this is going to be the hardest part for us being so far apart. I'm hoping to have every thing up here done early so we can move down earlier but I'm also having a hard time knowing I'm leaving everyone here. I'm hoping to get my mom blogging she says she wants to but we have trouble getting her to read her emails.
Below I have but some funny ways to answer the phone when talking to telemarketers. Let me now if you have ever used one of these methods and which one is your favorite. My favorite is #3 and I plan on trying it some time.

Creative ways to deal with telemarketers

1- Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, shout or scream, "Oh No!!!" and then hang up.

2- Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her HOME phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their HOME numbers you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me, either!" Hang up.

- Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.

3- Tell them it is dinner time, BUT ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation.

4- Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you a pizza.

5- Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.

6- Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your mom?"

7- If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

8- If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..."

9- If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work, are they married?, kids?, etc. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

10- Cry out in surprise,"Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

11- Say "No", over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

12- If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?"

13- After the Telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

14- Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company, they often can't sell to employees.

15- Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up... louder... louder...louder...

16- Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.

30 Degrees or 71 degrees?

We have been getting a lot of snow tonight. We are under a winter weather advisory. The picture below is Sarah Playing in the snow about a half hour into the snow storm. Our winter advisory isn't over until 9 AM.

Vince received a call on Thursday with a job offer. He worked most of all the details on Saturday. It is a great job making twice as much as he does now. There is big catch. The job is in West Palm Beach. Vince starts in January. The kids and I won't move down there until the beginning of June. That way they can finish this school year out here. We didn't think changing schools with that big of a move would not be good for them all at the same time. I cried the first night I found out. Mostly because I don't want to move that far away. It will be hard being that far away from our family. I never realized how much of a Mommies girl I was until now. I will be closer to my Grandma Lois. That I'm very happy about. The kids are happy about it most of the time. Coleman is so funny. He didn't want to go at first. Then when Vince told him they had a really good school that they would get to go to he was all for it. Way to go Coleman thinking of education. Sarah wanted to move until we mentioned that she wouldn't get to see her cousins very often. She started crying and said she would miss Samantha way to much. Vince told her we would make sure she gets to see all her cousins more before me and the kids move down. I'm not so hot about how hot it will be in the summers there. Which brings me to the title. Those are the current Temps as of 11:30PM. Of coure the feels like would look like this 19 degrees or 71 degrees. We are going to rent a house from Vince's new boss. At least at first. It's on a dead end road and the elementary is at the end of the dead end. I will blogg more asap.

Noah's Ark

Could Noah build his ark today?
If Noah had lived in the United States today the story may have gone something like this:

And the Lord spoke to Noah and said, "In one year, I am going to make it rain and cover the whole earth with water until all flesh is destroyed. But I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark."

In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. In fear and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the ark. "Remember," said the Lord, "you must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year."

Exactly one year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping. "Noah!" He shouted. "Where is the Ark?"

"Lord, please forgive me," cried Noah. "I did my best, but there were big problems.

"First, I had to get a permit for construction, and your plans did not meet the building codes. I had to hire an engineering firm and redraw the plans. Then I got into a fight with OSHA over whether or not the Ark needed a sprinkler system and approved floatation devices. Then, my neighbor objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from the city planning commission.

"Then, I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl. I finally convinced the U.S. Forest Service that I really needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Fish and Wildlife Service won't let me take the 2 owls.


"The carpenters formed a union and went on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the National Labor Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or hammer. Now, I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no owls.

"When I started rounding up the other animals, an animal rights group sued me. They objected to me taking only two of each kind aboard. This suit is pending.

"Meanwhile, the EPA notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood. They didn't take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the Universe.

"Then, the Army Corps of Engineers demanded a map of the proposed flood plain. I sent them a globe.

"Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking atheists aboard.

"The IRS has seized my assets, claiming that I'm building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying taxes. I just got a notice from the state that I owe them some kind of user tax and failed to register the Ark as a 'recreational water craft'.

"And finally, the ACLU got the courts to issue an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it's a religious event, and, therefore unconstitutional.

"I really don't think I can finish the Ark for another five or six years."

Noah waited. The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine, and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky.

Noah looked up hopefully. "You mean you're not going to destroy the earth, Lord?"

"No," He said sadly. "I don't have to. The government already has."

Happy Thanksgiving

I every one has a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Ageing Cartoons

Updates all around

Before I start I would like to say it is only a couple weeks early with the Christmas theme.

The kids have been doing well in school. They both got all A's and one B on their report cards. This is the first year Coleman has grades for science and social studies and others like that. Although here recently I have been having trouble getting Cole to bring his homework home. He forgets it at school at least once a week anymore. I'm not sure what to do about this. He will remember part of it but not all of it. He has had a lot of homework. Over the last three weeks he has had three book reports due. Sometimes I think their homework is parents homework with all the crazy projects they have to do. They time lines not long ago and I made Cole do his his self( I helped pick out the pictures) because this was his homework he is to learn from it. When I was at the school for his parent teacher conference I noticed Coleman and one other were the only ones done by the kids. What do you guys think about this kind of stuff? I'm just not sure.

Last Thursday was my nephew Zeke's 1st Birthday. I was glad we made it. I went with the kids. They had a good time. I have never seen a 1st Birthday cake destroyed so well. The cakes were made by my sister Brandee. She is so creative. I love seeing pictures of her latest creations. When it was present opening time Zeke wanted to play with the kids and not open but his sister Avril was all about the presents. She is one of those that makes you feel good about your present because she gets so excited. Below is a couple pictures of Zeke with the cake at the beginning and end. There are more pictures on flickr.

Saturday night I went to the kid's school carnival. We all had fun. Every year each classroom makes up a basket of a theme the class picks. This year Coleman's class picked candles and Sarah's class picked snacks. Each kid brings something in for the basket and in the middle of the carnival they stop the games and auction them off to the highest bidder. The money that the basket is sold for goes to that classroom. It really helps the teacher with supplies and new books. During the auction I ran Miranda home she was getting to be a handful. She does that the more tired she gets the less patience I have. Below are a few pictures. The boy in my picture pick is Hunter a little boy that lives in our trailer park. Sarah and him are good friends. His parents weren't going so I brought him with us also. I know I just like punishing myself by adding more kids. After coming back from dropping Miranda off I was talked into running a game. So we didn't get out of there until they were cleaning things up. Coleman loved it things that were 25 prize tickets when we got there were only 5 prize tickets at clean up go home time. The kids made out with all kinds of little goodies.

Pictures with a Laugh

What an awesome shot.


Does my breath smell?


They can't tell me where I can go.


I love you!


Time for a nap


Stop and smell the roses.


ROSES & HANGING BASKETS

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date
With this see-through blouse on and no bra.
Her grandmother just pitched a fit,
Telling her not to dare go out like that!
The teenager tells her 'Loosen up Grams.
These are modern times.
You gotta let your rose buds show!'
And out she goes.
The next day the teenager comes down stairs,
And the grandmother is sitting there with no top on.
The teenager wants to die.
She explains to her grandmother
That she has friends coming over
And that it is just not appropriate....
The grandmother says, 'Loosen up, Sweetie.
If you can show off your rose buds,
Then I can display my hanging baskets.

Happy Gardening.

Do I have a booger?

Got Milk?


I don't know why the kitten is screaming my teeth feel better already.


We should all smile more.

Treat or Recall

I was very upset last night to find out after I came home from trick or treating that the fake teeth I gave Coleman to wear were recalled yesterday morning. How did I not hear about this and how many other parents didn't hear about this. Vince said he heard it on his way home. With all things being recalled recently I think I'm going to get the kids tested for lead poisoning. After we got home Vince went around are park with us. We only went to a few houses because the Miranda was on a sugar high and been sneaking into her candy. We went to Busco first because their hours were earlier than ours and it would have been more daylight out. I also have a good friend that I work with we stopped by her house. She gave me and the kids food and drinks. What a sweet heart she is. Below is a short video I took at the second house we visited. I must say it was shortly after that, that Miranda started asking people for more candy or trying to take more herself. Like she needed more. I was a little embarrassed. You can see all the pictures I took on flickr.

Dancing and traing wheels

I took this last weekend when we were visiting with grandma Lois. The kids had so much fun.


I was on my way to get the kids after work on Friday when I looked over and seen the strange motorcycle. I call it a motorcycle with training wheels. It makes you wonder where people come up with these crazy ideas.

Just a thought or two

Some Vague Thoughts



If you want the world to beat a path to your door,

just try to take a nap on a Saturday afternoon.



Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by

the things you have for which you would not take money.



When your dreams turn to dust, it's time to vacuum.



Is your holier side your altar ego?



I need someone to refresh my memory. How many cars are

allowed through an intersection after the light turns red? Is it three or five?



What's dumber, expecting educators to be entertaining,

or expecting entertainment to be educational?



Vanity Plates seen on a Mercedes Benz in California - WAS HIS



Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills - Making the last car payment.



The trouble with Sunday drivers is, they don't drive any better during the week.



If you can't keep a secret, you don't need to know it.



Quote from the boss: "I didn't say it was your fault. I said

I was going to blame it on you."



NEW OLD SAYINGS



- The e-mail of the species is deadlier than the mail.



- A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.



- You can't teach a new mouse old clicks.



- Great groups from little icons grow.


- Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.


- C:\ is the root of all directories.



- Don't put all your hypes in one home page.



- Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.



- The modem is the message.



- Too many clicks spoil the browse.



- The geek shall inherit the earth.



- A chat has nine lives.

- Don't byte off more than you can view.

- Fax is stranger than fiction.

- What boots up must come down.

- Windows will never cease.

- In Gates we trust (and our tender is legal).

- Virtual reality is its own reward.

- Modulation in all things.

- A user and his leisure time are soon parted.

- Know what to expect before you connect.

- Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.

- Speed thrills.

- Give a man (or for that matter anyone) a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use The Net and he won't bother you for weeks.

Visiting Grandpa and Grandma Smith's House

Today we had a good time visiting with my parents and Missy's boyfriend Kevin and his family. Kevin had a birthday on Oct. 3rd. So we celebrated Sarah and Kevin's birthday together today. His family is such a joy to be around and I always love seeing my parents. Sarah asked for chocolate cake with chocolate icing and of course grandpa and grandma gave her what she wanted. Kevin's cake was white with chocolate chips baked in it and chocolate icing. They also had fudge swirl ice cream. Of course that all sounds good except my mom maid chop suey for lunch and that is one of my favorite family recipes. It is really more like chow main but we grew up calling it chop suey. I ate to much of lunch to have any room left for dessert. You can see the rest of the pictures on flickr.


My mom bought Sarah a scrap booking party kit. She couldn't wait to open it. We worked on a couple books this evening. Well I did the cover of the one she let me do. She loves cutting and pasting. Writing notes is another one of her favorites. I only had a few pictures for her but she mostly wrote things and used special stickers. I love seeing the kids art work. Sarah is very creative. She just told me last week that her favorite special was art. In school they call gym, library, music, and art specials. They have one of those every day of the week alternating. Her scrap book is funny looking it has long pieces of zig zag paper hang out off the pages. When she is done I will take pictures.

After church my parents were going to stop at the store before going home so Missy gave me her key and Kevin's parents were going to follow me to their house. Well that didn't go the way I had planned. For starters I turned the wrong way out of the church. Then turned on Paulding the wrong way. So, I we ended up in New Haven. A little after that when I thought I turned on Pettit. I was wrong. Towards the end of the road I realized that nothing looked familiar. So I looked at the next street sign what did it say but Oxford. Great I took them on a tour of the worst parts of Fort Wayne. During all this I stressed myself out because I felt so bad about the twice as long drive as it should have been. I ended up with spots in my eyes and a headache which made it even harder to drive. I also realized I left the diaper bag at church. I figured my mom could get that on wednesday night and I could get it from her next weekend. When I mentioned this to my mom she said she had a key to the church and we could get it later. When we went to get it I saw the car below and told her I should of got my camera out. I wish I had a picture of that. After retrieving the bag on our way home we saw the candy car again. I asked mom if she would follow it so I could get a picture. She did so, I was able to take a couple pictures. Thanks Mom.

What fall should look like

My Grandmother Emailed me these pictures and I though I would share them since are fall was so drab. I hope you enjoy.

Happy Birthday Sarah

Sarah turns eight on 10-08-07. It's her golden birthday this year. She wanted to get her ears pierced this year for her birthday. I took her yesterday and them done. I wanted to go on a day they had two workers in that way they could do both ears at once. She did so good. I could tell she was in a lot of pain. She stayed beside me through the rest of the our shopping. She also recieved four birthday cards yesterday. She was so excited she carried them around the rest of the night. I have pictures of her new earrings below. I also took on of her missing teeth. She has lost three teeth close together. I think it's so cute.